Wednesday, August 13, 2008

Family-Size in the New York Times

Click here to read an interesting article by Virginia Heffernan, that describes a cable tv show about "supersize" families.

I believe that supersize families can certainly be superhealthy families, but it takes resources to do that. Parents have to have the ability to give attention and finances.

What worries me more in Heffernan's article, is her quote from a mother who has two children (a normal American family size) and one on the way. She states, "Most of the time I feel like I'm gonna go insane." My concern and my research obsession is the effects of family size decisions on family wellbeing...more to come in a future posting.

You may click here to read my previous column about a wonderful large family, the Weitzners.


Leora said...

Why so worried about the mom of two with one on the sounds like she just needs some time to herself, to talk more about her feelings. And they do get bigger, the kids. I felt like I was going insane with just two little ones! Those two are now almost 12 and almost 14 and a pleasure, and my littlest is 6. Life got a lot easier at some point. It's really a question of whether the mom will just feel worse and worse, or if she'll get some help and relief.

I really enjoyed reading about the Weitzners (my father knows them, and my niece is related to them by marriage). Yes, some families do manage the big sizes well. And others live in la-la land, and the kids have issues. But it's probably not due to all the kids as much as due to parents that are clueless as to their kids' emotions.

Dr. Alan Singer said...

Thanks for your comments Leora.

Parents who say that they feel like they are "gonna go insane" are of great concern to me especially when we have a 50% divorce rate in the U.S.

True that the woman who was quoted in the article needs some help and relief...which is why we Marital Therapists are so busy.

Last, I agree with you that life gets easier at some point...but that is only if the marriage survives childrearing since numerous research studies show that marital satisfaction decreases with the arrival of each child. Parents who are aware of this, need to pay particular attention to nurturing their marriage.