Friday, April 29, 2011
I use my favorite sport in video #8 to make the following point: having a child means changes to "your life" not totally abandoning "your life". The self test questions found throughout my book are provided to help YOU make your decision because there is no one-size-fits-all.....perfect family size. It's up to you both to design what's perfect for your family.
The first group of self-test questions help you look at and evaluate YOU the Individual. We want you to be in good shape before you have a (another) child.
Small Request: for those of you who have already purchased the book....Thank You so much! Would you be kind enough to go to the Amazon and/or Barnes and Noble website and write your comments on the book. Thanks again
Friday, April 15, 2011
"What's the Ideal Number of Children?" is a great research question for the Gallup Poll** to ask.....but a waste of time for thoughtful couples to ask.
**See P. 71 of my book for 60 years of responses from individuals who answered that question.
So, What's the perfect family size? As many or as few.......(did you watch the video yet?)
Personal Note: My Dad bought me and helped me set up my first fish tank back in the 60's and I've kept up the hobby ever since. In the video you can see guppies, platties, and catfish. I assume you were plotzing to know that.
Tuesday, April 12, 2011
Only children are not lonelier.
Marriage isn't supposed to make you happy; it's supposed to make you married (Dr. Frank Pittman)
You can't have everything, where would you put it? (Steven Wright)
Here is how biology works; You have 1 child and you receive a new title---parent.
Here is how psychology works: How do you feel about being parents?
If parenting is "ok" and you are not all that thrilled with it....Don't-Please-Don't let anyone's comment like, you'll want to give her a little brother, won't you? influence you.
Video #6 makes the point that only children are NOT social misfits. They are wonderful, normal, and happy children. Don't have another child because of external pressures. Only do it because of your internal desire for another child.
Friday, April 08, 2011
Timing is the keyword I stress more than any other throughout the book. Don’t waste time asking yourself, “How many total children do we want?” or “What is the ideal number of children in a family?” Those aren’t decisions you should be making. Timing is THE decision you must make; together and carefully.
The key question: Is now the best time for us to have a (another) child?
Personal Note: As embarrassed as my children are that Dad is wearing his wetsuit for this book trailer, Mr. Noah Wolfe, foremost expert on social media in North America stated, “Pops, this video has legs”. Let’s see what happens Noah!
Wednesday, April 06, 2011
What right do I have to advocate for The One Best Reason to have another child?
"To carry on the family name" "To be just like other couples" and "To care for me when I'm old" are very common responses to the question, What is the reason you had a child?
Here's who I am......I have helped couples fix their marriages for 3 decades. In video #4 I make this point: If the reason you are having another child is because you have a son and are now trying for a daughter, you have a 50% chance of success. Since children (on average) tend to decrease marital satisfaction, I want your marriage to have a much better chance than 50%!
Personal Note: On the right end of the piano is a photo of my Dad, Joseph Singer(of blessed memory) author of the quote that starts my book, "When all else fails, read the directions."
Saturday, April 02, 2011
The Pew Research Center surveyed 1003 adults recently. The respondents were asked how important various reasons were for them in deciding to have their first child. “It wasn’t a decision, it just happened” was cited by 35% of parents as very important!
Book Trailer video #3 is the best of the worst reasons to have a (another) child. The video takes less than a minute, but it’s packed full of mediocrity.
[Note to self for next book: wait for snow, then roll out the snow blower]