tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-193588122012-01-30T10:58:00.817-05:00A Parenting DialogueDr. Alan M. Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00242709892550579433noreply@blogger.comBlogger1461100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-88243198206013407832012-01-30T10:58:00.003-05:002012-01-30T10:58:00.826-05:00

Do the ups and downs of your marriage feel like an amusement park ride? Does this unending relationship cycle ring a bell: Trouble Begins > Meltdown > Silent Treatment > Cooling Off > Conversation Restarts > Back to So-Called “Normal”.When I counsel couples who fit this profile, I label the pattern: a Ferris_Wheel Relationship. The biggest problem is that a seemingly benign cyclical pattern may,

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-55227782505835899372012-01-17T14:05:00.003-05:002012-01-17T14:05:00.638-05:00

Research is research....no? If it's valid and reliable, it should be quotable....right? Does it also need to be "sensitive" to its readership?The diversity of the new American family means that less than half of U.S. families are now headed by a married couple. I was shocked when my publisher required me to remove this irrefutable research finding: "The best environment in which to raise children

Dr. Alan M. Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00242709892550579433noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-24782724316461446322011-12-09T10:00:00.000-05:002011-12-09T10:00:10.106-05:00

What I liked best about my interview with contributing writer Rebecca Welsh, was the rapid fire nature of her questions. She had prepared what seemed like 20 questions, each one expanding on the previous and in sequence. I remember reading the Targum regularly during my 13 year stint at the Rutgers PhD in Social Work program. Here is the quote from PR Web that caught Rebecca's attention: “

Dr. Alan M. Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00242709892550579433noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-31221463795514958472011-11-04T12:32:00.012-04:002011-11-04T12:56:16.929-04:00

Robin Schwartz is not only a talented TV anchor for Fox in Detroit, she is also a skilled free-lance writer for Red Thread, which is the monthly magazine of the Detroit Jewish News. Click here to read her excellent piece on Family Size Decisions which cites my book.She brings a deeply personal perspective to the discussion of family size decisions. Click here to watch her own family struggle with

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-83661422034443206952011-09-05T14:32:00.000-04:002011-09-05T14:32:00.159-04:00

Of the 18 book-related TV segments that I did this summer…..Miami, which is where I was born and raised, was both the cutest and most scientific. Strange combo? You’ll see when you watch the clip (CLICK HERE) how adorable these infants-with-Moms are that CBS4 anchor Ms. Cynthia Demos was able to assemble on a rainy August afternoon in Coral Gables. And I really admire Cynthia’s use of scientific

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-5143111097954729722011-07-25T15:31:00.002-04:002011-07-26T00:15:40.539-04:00

Fox & Friends Weekend segment - July 24, 2011The Right Number of Kids for YouAuthor creates your perfect family sizeWatch the latest video at <a href="http://video.foxnews.com">video.foxnews.com</a>On the Friday before my F & F segment, I was driving across Staten Island, and my car’s outside temperature showed 113

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-45005595160410592652011-07-23T23:53:00.002-04:002011-07-23T23:57:14.605-04:00

If you are up tomorrow (Sunday) at 9:40am EST……..I will (God willing) be discussing Family Size Decisions on Fox and Friends WeekendBestAlan

Dr. Alan M. Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00242709892550579433noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-56368815267314115912011-07-15T18:01:00.000-04:002011-07-15T18:01:01.061-04:00

When Melinda Spaulding, anchor at Fox 26 Houston, asked me what I think of that prioritization (her mother's quote) she caught me off guard. After a moment of reflection, I agreed with her and praised her mother for her insight. Not all the Book Tour interviews were that intuitive, but each was an unforgettable experience. When Monica Malpass invited me to WPVI in Phili, I had no idea that we

Dr. Alan M. Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00242709892550579433noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-65801741273374741312011-06-13T23:42:00.001-04:002011-06-13T23:42:00.355-04:00

As you can see from these links, the book tour is well under way. My experience in TV has been limited but apparently, all of life needs to be placed into 3 minute segments because that is what holds peoples' attention. Above (embedded) is the WXYZ-Detroit segment. The anchor in Fox59 Indianapolis (see below) was sharp and concise. He read the back cover of my book which says that (Singer) made

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-29421752968482257452011-05-19T10:00:00.003-04:002011-05-19T10:00:04.070-04:00

The "parenting" self-test questions in my book are addressed in video #10. Water ski guy dealt with you-the-individual; washing machine guy discussed your marriage and you as a couple. For couples who already have a child, these category three questions cover two key (and different) elements:Are you a good parent? (skills, ability, diligence)Do you really enjoy parenting? (pleasurable, rewarding

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-39860845957000377262011-05-16T10:00:00.005-04:002011-05-16T10:00:01.331-04:00

The book presentation/signing at Nighthawk Books in Highland Park, N.J. was unforgettable….and Mr. Steven Hart, the owner was terrific and couldn’t have been more accommodating. Favorite Question of the Day: Asked by a married woman in her 50’s who has children and grandchildren……"Dr. Singer, is it presumptuous to give Creating Your Perfect Family Size to newlyweds as a gift?" Great question: I

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-24063950986510820682011-05-08T12:29:00.001-04:002011-05-08T12:39:04.566-04:00

Sharon Jayson wrote another excellent column and this time it discusses my favorite topic, family size. Click here to read her column from this past Friday and be sure to join in the lively discussion by submitting your comment. Here is my latest comment on their website: It never ceases to amaze me how a simple conversation about how many children one should have....and what goes into the

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-90400489327180582662011-05-06T09:00:00.000-04:002011-05-06T09:00:12.020-04:00

You know how important product placement is these days folks.....well I placed my product right in front of the Silver Jaguar on display and it did the trick. Barnes and Noble at Menlo was just terrific and they are the only store in Central NJ (and this continent) to have actual autographed books for sale.It was Mom's Night Out at the Mall and there were mostly Mom's enjoying the atmosphere of

Dr. Alan M. Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00242709892550579433noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-28739542438605411972011-05-05T11:15:00.005-04:002011-05-05T11:15:00.060-04:00

Video #9 is about the self-test questions that pertain to your marriage. The research is plentiful…...marriage gives individuals numerous benefits that parenting does not (an excellent resource is the book, "The Case for Marriage"). Parents must have couples time to insure a solid relationship. They need weekly date nights, occasional weekend getaways, and to be close to extended family to save $

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-7524897269065261632011-05-03T16:00:00.005-04:002011-05-03T16:00:01.775-04:00

To my friends, neighbors, and colleagues: I want to thank all of you who have called and/or emailed me this week for the launching (by Wiley) of my book Creating Your Perfect Family Size. Your enthusiasm and good wishes are uplifting. The first two discussion/book signings are taking place this week in Central New Jersey.Thursday May 5 6-8pm near the Barnes and Noble in the Menlo Park Mall,

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-20518853199703793032011-04-29T10:51:00.006-04:002011-04-29T19:24:30.165-04:00

I use my favorite sport in video #8 to make the following point: having a child means changes to "your life" not totally abandoning "your life". The self test questions found throughout my book are provided to help YOU make your decision because there is no one-size-fits-all.....perfect family size. It's up to you both to design what's perfect for your family.The first group of self-test

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-91445464776572949392011-04-15T10:00:00.001-04:002011-04-15T10:00:02.094-04:00

"What's the Ideal Number of Children?" is a great research question for the Gallup Poll** to ask.....but a waste of time for thoughtful couples to ask. **See P. 71 of my book for 60 years of responses from individuals who answered that question.So, What's the perfect family size? As many or as few.......(did you watch the video yet?)Personal Note: My Dad bought me and helped me set up my first

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-31176425521653164402011-04-12T21:50:00.002-04:002011-04-12T21:50:00.265-04:00

Only children are not lonelier. Marriage isn't supposed to make you happy; it's supposed to make you married (Dr. Frank Pittman)You can't have everything, where would you put it? (Steven Wright)Here is how biology works; You have 1 child and you receive a new title---parent.Here is how psychology works: How do you feel about being parents?If parenting is "ok" and you are not all that thrilled

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-54537259373256679112011-04-08T11:35:00.000-04:002011-04-08T11:35:00.187-04:00

Timing is the keyword I stress more than any other throughout the book. Don’t waste time asking yourself, “How many total children do we want?” or “What is the ideal number of children in a family?” Those aren’t decisions you should be making. Timing is THE decision you must make; together and carefully.The key question: Is now the best time for us to have a (another) child? Personal Note: As

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-37269095565232607282011-04-06T11:58:00.001-04:002011-04-06T11:58:00.302-04:00

What right do I have to advocate for The One Best Reason to have another child?"To carry on the family name" "To be just like other couples" and "To care for me when I'm old" are very common responses to the question, What is the reason you had a child? Here's who I am......I have helped couples fix their marriages for 3 decades. In video #4 I make this point: If the reason you are having another

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-56442341716983373462011-04-02T23:20:00.005-04:002011-04-02T23:20:00.305-04:00

The Pew Research Center surveyed 1003 adults recently. The respondents were asked how important various reasons were for them in deciding to have their first child. “It wasn’t a decision, it just happened” was cited by 35% of parents as very important! Book Trailer video #3 is the best of the worst reasons to have a (another) child. The video takes less than a minute, but it’s packed full of

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-74320835726837817662011-03-30T10:00:00.007-04:002011-03-30T10:00:11.469-04:00

Here is the flow of the dozen videos: the first few are about poor reasons to have a (another) child. Then comes the best reason to have a child followed by the timing of children and the myth of the only child. Last are the self test questions re: you the individual, your marriage, and your parenting skills. Video #2 is a reflection of the fact that I NEVER tell couples that what they need (

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-9324094780199675532011-03-23T10:00:00.008-04:002011-03-23T20:55:53.767-04:00

Here's the first of 12 video trailers for my new book. The instructions from my son-in-law Noah, were explicit: each video, no matter how shticky, must have content. So I set up 12 story boards of content and then built the scenery and plot (?) around the content.[Video 1: man in trench coat; U.S. flag in background]After all the editing of the book was done by Jossey-Bass, lo and behold....the

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-70211528716636565162011-03-17T10:13:00.008-04:002011-03-22T23:34:07.887-04:00

Decades in the making and my book, Creating Your Perfect Family Size has finally arrived! Look right >>>>>>>>>>>and you’ll see the links to your favorite booksellers. My wife says it took 28 years, because she adds the 13 years that I worked on my PhD (dissertation topic = family size decisions) together with the 15 years post-doc. My children say, “Dad’s coming out of the basement this year!” If

Dr. Alan M. Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00242709892550579433noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-66456474394042603972011-03-11T10:01:00.010-05:002011-03-11T12:13:28.769-05:00

The number of babies born in the United States fell by 2.3 percent in 2009, and the number is continuing to slide. The recent drop in births puts the U.S. total fertility rate below the replacement level of about 2.1 births per woman. These are the findings that are posted on the Population Reference Bureau website in an informative article by Mary Mederios Kent."The recent fall is not surprising

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-5797926473248703662011-03-01T12:40:00.007-05:002011-03-01T12:40:00.326-05:00

Home sick today and popping medications, advil, and vitamins, gave me this chance to blog about Liz Szabo's recent piece in USA Today about child safety and medications.According to Szabo, "Most such poisonings occur in 1- and 2-year-olds — an age group whose curiosity and climbing skills often outstrip their judgment — according to a new report from the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-36986590591062010732011-02-24T10:44:00.010-05:002011-02-24T14:26:03.847-05:00

Parental estrangement is a miserable topic to be sure, but unfortunately for some, it is a common part of family life. Several weeks ago, I planned to blog about this topic but then I came across a story that made me re-focus my thinking which I described in my monthly Home News Tribune column.Be sure to read Dr. Woolverton's email to me (below) Frederick Woolverton’s essay on parental

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-89802467865588967572011-02-07T10:00:00.004-05:002011-02-09T22:43:21.902-05:00

Bill Doherty, who I cite in this blog every chance I get, raises some terrific questions in his Psychology Today essay on Abby Sunderland, the teenager who sailed around the world. He makes some crucial points about the role of modern parents in how they give guidance and supervision to their children. When the American dream is calling your child, how do you say no? How have we allowed our

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-86188937445852725622011-01-17T10:13:00.007-05:002011-01-17T10:13:00.099-05:00

Community means a lot more to family well being than a street address. Community is support, camaraderie, and education. This post, which is my monthly Home News Tribune column is a description of the Gush Etzion communities of Israel, located just south of Jerusalem. On a recent trip to Israel, I had the opportunity to have coffee with Mr. Shaul Goldstein, who is the mayor of the Gush Etzion

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-20990884069655953012010-12-23T10:00:00.005-05:002010-12-23T10:00:00.599-05:00

What is a "good-enough" marriage?And why is Booth and Amato's 1997 finding, that 2/3 of divorces end "good-enough" not high-conflict marriages, so significant?Elizabeth Marquardt wrote an excellent piece for the Huffington Post. Here are some excerpts:"We disagree about a lot of things. Sometimes I think our kids would be better off if we both moved on.""I've been researching and writing about

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-10703360526707653402010-12-07T09:51:00.007-05:002010-12-07T09:51:00.673-05:00

Children are special treasures that are entrusted to us to protect. Particularly in the summer, I spot safety risks for children that land parents in the Hall of Shame.Here is my monthly parenting column from the Home News Tribune.Each summer I inevitably observe parenting behavior that appalls but not necessarily surprises me. I often say, if there were such a thing as a parenting license, these

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-66914919421025916332010-11-19T10:00:00.006-05:002010-11-21T22:13:18.270-05:00

One of my favorite familythinking.com readers named, “anonymous” responded to my recent post, When an Adult Child Cuts Off a Parent, by sending me a link that she found. It’s a post on parentdish.com that is titled “When Adult Children Fight, a Mother's Heart Breaks” and was written by Jessica Barksdale Inclan. It is well written and poignant. She describes the distinctly different personalities

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-10145487118781627162010-11-03T10:35:00.005-04:002010-11-03T10:35:00.206-04:00

I wish I had a more chipper post for Election Day folks; this is just plain sad.Therapists for years have listened to patients blame parents for their problems. What about the suffering of parents who are estranged from their adult children? Joshua Coleman, a San Francisco psychologist who is an expert on parental estrangement, says that parents often report that a once-close relationship has

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-21592357252618319732010-10-14T10:00:00.010-04:002010-10-15T08:10:57.747-04:00

A recent column by David Brooks is a real thought stimulator. He illuminates two ways of thinking about your life, that are described by Clayton Christensen who is a professor at the Harvard Business School. The first is what you might call the Well-Planned Life. Once you have come up with an overall purpose, you have to make decisions about allocating your time, energy and talent. Christensen

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-44747036214344479042010-09-27T09:16:00.004-04:002010-09-27T09:31:04.637-04:00

The Power of ParentingWhether you’re cooking a gourmet meal, ordering food from your favorite take-out place or eating on the go, rest assured that what your children really want during dinnertime is YOU! Family meals are the perfect time to talk to your children and to listen to what’s on their mind. The more often children eat dinner with their families, the less likely they are to smoke,

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-69237577978213264922010-09-20T10:00:00.005-04:002010-09-20T10:00:08.453-04:00

Heard of the "third age"? Neither did I until I read some of the op-eds on the Gores' separation. Forty years of marriage and now they should explore their freedom and pursue someone new and exciting? This Op-Ed really got my blood boiling.Here is my monthly parenting column from the Home News Tribune:When a high-profile couple like Al and Tipper Gore separate from each other, we feel sadness

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-28575630130007929802010-08-23T09:56:00.007-04:002010-08-23T09:56:00.396-04:00

The Great Recession, as they now call it, continues to bash the middle class and adversely affect family well being. A recent piece by Judith Warner in the NY Times, is as usual, excellent. Some of the highlights:"Economists may assert that we’re in the early stages of a recovery, but surveys continue to show that the impact of the Great Recession on American families is deep, widespread and grim

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-19539437663634908652010-08-10T10:00:00.004-04:002010-08-10T10:00:01.697-04:00

Here is my monthly parenting column in the Home News TribuneWhat responsibility does a school have in filtering personal family matters that a child might innocently offer in a public display? This question occurred to me after reading about one mother’s hurt feelings when her daughter’s publicly displayed essay listed Dad as her role model in life and not Mom. I wondered why the daughter wasn’t

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-6198379927042327822010-07-30T10:00:00.004-04:002010-07-30T10:00:06.597-04:00

The Recession and Families: Post 4 of 4This severe economic downturn may help the dating scene as people are looking for simple companionship. Click here to read an interesting piece that was written by the Associated Press. The article explains, "Credit the recession for staycations and bringing us more game-night parties at home. But also give it a shout for spurring more first dates. Economic

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-88807996076734727572010-07-09T10:00:00.005-04:002010-07-10T22:07:30.245-04:00

The Recession and Families: Post 3 of 4What effect does an unemployed parent have on family well being?Do men take over family responsibilities when their wives become the sole breadwinners?Michael Luo wrote an excellent piece for the NY Times recently that describes the impact of this recession on families. "For many families across the country, the greatest damage inflicted by this recession

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-47333718383076567132010-06-18T10:00:00.005-04:002010-06-18T18:04:38.687-04:00

The Recession and Families: Post 2 of 4“Judging by recent press reports,” writes Bradford Wilcox in the Wall Street Journal, “the family fallout associated with the Great Recession has been severe.” According to Money & Marriage, a report released recently by the National Marriage Project at the University of Virginia and the Institute for American Values, the financial pressures associated with

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-91122070449796851342010-06-02T10:00:00.005-04:002010-06-02T10:00:03.050-04:00

The Recession and Families: Post 1 of 4"Psychologists and economists now know that although the very rich are no happier than the merely rich, for the other 99 percent of us, happiness is greatly enhanced by a few quaint assets, like shelter, sustenance and security. Americans are smiling less and worrying more than they were a year ago, happiness is down and sadness is up, we are getting less

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-55352079687681266692010-05-14T10:00:00.002-04:002010-05-14T10:00:05.617-04:00

Here's my monthly column from the Home News Tribune:Family car trips are very different than two decades ago, when our children were pre-teens. There are still plenty of lunches and snacks to prepare, and the frequent "Are we there yet?'' questions. However the "in-flight'' entertainment has really evolved. Back in the day, for the news, there was the car radio. For music, we had cassettes, and

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-53704867408106885962010-04-16T10:00:00.003-04:002010-04-16T10:00:04.617-04:00

We have just passed the 40th anniversary of that much vilified institution, the no-fault divorce. "It is an appropriate moment to re-evaluate how divorce affects families, and particularly children," states Ruth Bettelheim in a recent NY Times Op-Ed. Here are some excerpts from the Op-Ed:"As child support is often linked to the proportion of time the children spend with each parent, the days and

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-20876046516130786702010-03-24T10:00:00.003-04:002010-03-24T21:51:51.743-04:00

Susan Gregory Thomas wrote a piece on MSNBC titled, Today's tykes: Secure kids or rudest in history? She adds, "Parents' focus on building self-esteem may neglect compassion for others."Thomas starts with a couple of obnoxious stories:A commenter on a recent New York Times’ blog recounted seeing a preschooler purposely trip a woman in a crowded restaurant, and chortle, “‘Mommy, did you see me

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-34933514425714598522010-03-18T10:00:00.001-04:002010-03-18T10:00:03.652-04:00

Susan Goldberg recently ranted in the NY Times about smug parents who do their parenting in public places and “at the top of their highly educated lungs.” “If we’re being honest” she writes, “we have all had the same frightening and ignoble urge to smash their heads in with a brick.” Really Sue, we all have that urge? You want honesty? You’ve got considerable Chutzpa!Unlike you Susan, no matter

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-31458253220517009632010-03-10T10:00:00.006-05:002010-03-10T22:12:42.696-05:00

In celebration of Post 100, I present my recent column from the Home News Tribune titled, "Times have changed; so has Grand Parenting". In it, I describe my grandfather (born 1887) and my grandson (born 2007) and everyone in between. That span = 120 years. I pose the question, has grand parenting changed all that much in the last few decades or is it my imagination? I'd love to hear your comments

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-74313066533942387822010-02-26T09:30:00.003-05:002010-02-26T09:30:00.564-05:00

When it comes to government spending that is.I like David Brooks' recent NYTimes column, "The Geezer's Crusade". It's an insightful look into what Grandparents can do for future generations. Grandparents you ask?Brooks writes: "A series of longitudinal studies, begun decades ago, are producing a rosier portrait of life after retirement. These studies don’t portray old age as surrender or even

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-31364120233576044732010-02-19T09:30:00.009-05:002010-02-19T15:51:02.058-05:00

Linda Carroll wrote a nice piece for MSNBC that belongs in the category of counter intuitive research.Is boredom really worse than fighting in a marriage?According to Carroll, experts say that shared challenges and exciting diversions are what make relationships interesting long after the wedding gown has been packed up and stored away. And the opposite, boredom and a dull, daily routine, can

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-19082282224428099112010-02-09T10:00:00.007-05:002010-03-01T20:55:25.136-05:00

Movie reviews are not my forte, so I'd like to limit my comments to several important aspects of a thoroughly enjoyable comedy. This Home News Tribune column was published on February 3, 2010. Written and directed by Nancy Meyers, "It's Complicated" focuses on the seemingly rekindled romance of Jane Adler (Meryl Streep) and Jake Adler (Alec Baldwin), who are the parents of three terrific children

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-14638630644814405742010-01-29T09:34:00.004-05:002010-01-29T09:34:00.874-05:00

Not that this has anything to do with parenting, but I must rant about my pet peeve: people who stop at the top/bottom of a staircase or escalator and people who come to a complete halt in a doorway. Folks, these are passageways so please keep moving. I normally start singing (aloud) Bob Dylan’s lyrics, “Don’t stand in the doorway, don’t block up the hall.”Pamela Lewis ranted about this recently

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-77231372343900214272010-01-22T09:00:00.005-05:002010-01-22T09:00:00.626-05:00

This is the third in a series of 3 posts on Child SafetyPost 1: Better Safe than Stupid...click herePost 2: Dr. Singer, Practice what you Preach...click hereA recent report by the Center for Disease Control concerning childhood injury provides some very useful information. In a Washington Post article, titled “How Kids Get Hurt” author David Brown states, “Around the world, fatal injuries in

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-90603568530920892022010-01-14T09:30:00.000-05:002010-01-14T09:30:01.248-05:00

The time has come in this blog, to add a new key word: counterintuitive. That word came to mind when I read about one study done at Brigham Young University which found that the onset of physical disability boosts marital happiness more often than not. Consider these two Findings:>Both men and women, regardless of age, reported being happier in their marriage after they themselves became

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-50095298456664138092010-01-05T10:00:00.007-05:002010-02-28T21:56:25.797-05:00

Pediatric Nurse Cindy criticized me after reading my October column about the man I saw mowing his lawn with his infant in a snugly on his back. My question remains: Isn't there a big difference between taking action when a child appears to be in danger and the child's parent is right there? Here is my follow-up parenting column on child safety published on January 3, 2010 in the Home News

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-315579834479045782009-12-24T10:00:00.005-05:002009-12-24T10:00:06.205-05:00

True love may be the key to a long and happy marriage – but being a dentist or an agricultural engineer helps, too, according to new research. A paper that correlates occupations with divorce and separation rates, to be published in the Journal of Police and Criminal Psychology (author: great name for a Journal) reveals that those employed in extrovert and stressful jobs are highly likely to

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-19258801588502649672009-12-10T10:00:00.006-05:002009-12-10T10:00:07.454-05:00

Psychologists claim that it is frequently the giver, not the recipient, who reaps the largest psychological gains from a gift.Here is my monthly Home News Tribune column that was published on November 30, 2009.In a New York Times article about gift-giving, Tara Parker-Pope wrote about the importance of gifts in helping to define relationships and strengthen bonds with family and friends. She

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-73253216095796077052009-11-30T10:00:00.004-05:002009-11-30T10:00:00.460-05:00

Swedish scientists discovered that long life and good health have nothing to do with a man’s education and everything to do with his wife’s. Men married to smart women, live longer. This cute piece comes from UK’s the Sunday Times. It makes a solid point about the health benefits of marriage, which are quite well known. Here is the link to the actual research……a very impressive sample size of 1.5

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-4418836793061124272009-11-18T10:00:00.006-05:002009-11-21T21:13:59.741-05:00

The idea that babies born in winter months are less intelligent is raising its ridiculous head again. But a recent Wall Street Journal article that my son-in-law sent me is surprisingly good. It describes how sound research methodology is being applied to the question of winter babies and intelligence. Factors that were studied include:Mother’s educational levelAge that a teen drops out of

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-65281715234714772392009-11-16T10:00:00.006-05:002009-11-16T10:00:01.307-05:00

A new March of Dimes study found that over one million babies worldwide die each year because they are born too soon, according to the first report to estimate the "global burden" of premature births.Liz Szabo in USA Today states: “The preterm birth rate in the USA is especially high: 12.7% of all babies are born early, according to the March of Dimes. That rate has increased 36% in the past 25

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-19457490884505930862009-10-30T09:30:00.006-04:002010-01-10T14:26:47.760-05:00

Here is my monthly Home News Tribune column that was published on October 29, 2009. Doesn't it just burn you up to see a parent acting ridiculously irresponsible? A parent must assume full responsibility for their child's well-being at all times, from infancy to when the child starts school, and then some. That's why something that I saw recently left an indelible impression on me.One fall

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-52427957959797376452009-10-15T10:21:00.003-04:002009-10-18T12:25:37.287-04:00

This is a superb piece in the WSJ by Kate Hymowitz. Among her excellent points:“Higher-income, college-educated couples are far more likely to get married and stay married than their less-educated and lower-income peers.” The typical divorce is not of mid-life couples who are bored, 20% of marriages break up within 5 years. She provides excellent statistics and a good grasp of the “marital

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-44137023650567875382009-10-01T10:13:00.010-04:002009-10-07T22:12:11.177-04:00

Here's my monthly Home News column which appeared on September 22, 2009 and was titled "A First Child, and Many Anxieties". Arlene and Jeffrey are a tremendous source of information and inspiration. When I first met with Arlene and Jeffrey, (click here to read my previous column) they had just finished their first year of marriage and were grappling with the questions:When is the best time to

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-49015327233107242042009-09-14T09:44:00.010-04:002010-08-10T09:14:42.199-04:00

This column is about spousal behavior in bed, and it is rated "G" because my children read my columns, and because it is not about intimacy at all. The subjects to be covered here are sleep research and marital communication.The Home News Tribune published this piece on August 31, 2009.As Dr. Paul Rosenblatt, professor of sociology at the University of Minnesota, explained to Kate Murphy of the

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-71948024578018382292009-09-10T09:49:00.004-04:002009-09-10T09:49:00.351-04:00

I believe that unwarranted praise of children is a contributing factor in this entitlement psychology. Here's a welcome back to college post. Max Roosevelt wrote an excellent piece for the NY Times. He interviewed Prof. Marshall Grossman, who has come to expect complaints whenever he returns graded papers in his English classes at the University of Maryland. “Many students come in with the

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-24127793473958528302009-08-27T10:20:00.007-04:002009-08-27T10:20:00.068-04:00

The things that fascinate adults may not impress children at all and vice versa. In my latest Home News Tribune column I discuss this topic.You can try to impress young children by showing them the wonders of the world, but it might not be a good investment of your time. What you think will leave them awestruck doesn't, and the seemingly minor details of life will amaze them. So don't try to

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-75497129834485724822009-08-14T10:00:00.010-04:002009-08-14T10:00:03.492-04:00

Summertime Week post 5 of 5In see-saw parenting, moms and dads go from one extreme to the other. The sun is evil and constant use of high SPF sunscreen has resulted in: most American youngsters aren't getting enough vitamin D, and that deficiency is associated with an increased incidence of risk factors for cardiovascular problems such as heart attack and stroke, two new studies find according to

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-71496441980670691272009-08-12T10:03:00.008-04:002009-08-12T10:03:00.277-04:00

Summertime Week post 4 of 5Camps with full-time parent liaisons?Summer camp as a secret vacation from Ritalin?Have meddlesome mothers and fathers forgotten that one main point of overnight camp is to give children a chance to solve problems without parental assistance?And what is "fading parental morality"?Tina Kelley described the changes in summer camps in her article in the NY Times. Most

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-82631301311390575972009-08-06T10:00:00.004-04:002009-08-06T10:00:01.675-04:00

Summertime Week post 3 of 5Are forward-facing strollers having a negative effect on babies’ language development? Britain’s National Literacy Trust commissioned Suzanne Zeedyk’s research team to look into this question. Forward-facing strollers are by far the most common, but babies in them are the least likely to be interacting socially. Zeedyk, a senior lecturer in developmental psychology at

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-26279600662832290002009-07-31T10:00:00.005-04:002009-07-31T10:00:00.370-04:00

Summertime Week post 2 of 4A number of books are in stores this summer and they attempt to describe the lighter side of bad parenting. It's Sick.I support things in families which help both children and parents like marriage, for example. Strong marriage benefits spouses and their children. Along come several books that reveal and even brag about incidents of bad parenting. Ellen Gamerman’s Wall

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-80270576905205779862009-07-23T10:00:00.007-04:002009-08-05T22:16:54.653-04:00

Summertime Post 1 of 4American children are heavier than ever. Many people point their finger at schools: snack machines, high calorie lunches, and curtailed daily exercise. Jane Brody wrote in the NY Times, "Although schools are hardly off the hook, a study published in The American Journal of Public Health, which tracked the physical condition of 5,000 children as they passed through

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-19846597576854217382009-07-14T10:28:00.006-04:002009-08-06T13:08:03.479-04:00

When Huffington Post announced the "All For Good" campaign of the White House for national service, the release stated: "In troubling times it's important for us to come together and lend a hand to our community".I wrote to HP and described my volunteer work in central New Jersey with couples who need marital therapy and have been hard-hit by the recession.Stephanie Harnett of HP interviewed me

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-89265584119223698012009-07-07T10:00:00.006-04:002009-07-07T10:48:09.382-04:00

What irked me about Ed Goldman's "My Turn" essay was when he stated regarding his 3rd wife and himself, "The fact that our first marriages were relatively brief misjudgements." That motivated me to post a comment on the Newsweek website. Ed Goldman then commented on my post. Click here to read the tale as it appears in my monthly Home News Tribune column. June is for weddings, so here's a column

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-92113264456051975742009-06-26T10:00:00.000-04:002009-06-26T10:00:35.555-04:00

Stress Week installment 4 of 4If Discovery Channel presents Shark Week for your entertainment each summer, then we at FamilyThinking.com can present "Stress Week" so that you enjoy a stress-free and fun-filled summer.Everyone gets stressed, even babies, according to a recent Newswise release. Now, it appears how infants respond to stress is linked to if they have a particular form of a certain

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-37065439704244116612009-06-24T10:00:00.004-04:002009-06-24T10:00:20.842-04:00

Stress Week installment 3 of 4If Discovery Channel presents Shark Week for your entertainment each summer, then we at FamilyThinking.com can present "Stress Week" so that you enjoy a stress-free and fun-filled summer.Peggy Orenstein recently lamented (in the New York Times magazine) that in the old days, kindergarten was a place to play and not even consider something as ridiculous as homework.

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-41734962485887819002009-06-18T10:00:00.004-04:002009-06-18T12:17:33.638-04:00

Stress Week installment 2 of 4If Discovery Channel presents Shark Week for your entertainment each summer, then we at FamilyThinking.com can present "Stress Week" so that you enjoy a stress-free and fun-filled summer.Technology can help unlock the secrets of DNA but can it substitute for nature? Apparently not, according to a new study that measured individuals’ heart recovery rate from minor

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-17824795770910286672009-06-12T10:00:00.010-04:002009-06-16T04:27:13.095-04:00

Stress Week Installment 1 of 4. If Discovery Channel presents Shark Week for your entertainment each summer, then we at FamilyThinking.com can present "Stress Week" so that you enjoy a stress-free and fun-filled summer.Mary Jo Rapini, a psychotherapist in Houston suggests, Stress and anxiety can erode trust between partners." (True)She adds, "The key to getting through this crisis is to realize

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-28427864963520735642009-06-02T10:00:00.004-04:002009-06-02T10:00:01.509-04:00

Keri objected to my column on the consequences of delayed childbearing. This column was published in the Home News Tribune on May 29, 2009. Be sure to take note of the strangest interview question I ever asked....in the next to last paragraph. I viewed our correspondence as a valuable experience since I don't get many opportunities to dialogue with articulate, child-free individuals. I don't know

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-61031693200714244042009-05-28T10:00:00.003-04:002009-06-01T23:04:03.815-04:00

New research at the University of Haifa found that, contrary to common belief, young adults who maintain a close or moderate relationship with their parents exhibit greater independence in their personal lives than those who have a distant relationship. In her research, Dr. Irit Yanir evaluated how a parent-child relationship is connected to one's ability to fulfill society's expectations in

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-69845497344779973562009-05-21T10:00:00.007-04:002009-05-21T22:25:34.357-04:00

According to preliminary results of a University of Michigan study, "Couples in which both the husband and wife suppress their anger when one attacks the other die earlier than members of couples where one or both partners express their anger and resolve the conflict." Researchers looked at 192 couples over 17 years and placed the couples into one of four categories: *Both partners communicate

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-28845655887200712332009-05-13T10:00:00.006-04:002009-05-13T10:00:00.242-04:00

With increased fertility treatments, the U.S. birthrate of twins has more than doubled in the past 30 years and the number of triplets has increased significantly. Parents often face a horrific decision. Somewhat overlooked, are the surges of neonatal deaths, developmental disabilities, as well as other long-term problems. (I have described the consequences of delayed childbearing in several

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-78869021374471782292009-05-04T10:00:00.003-04:002009-05-11T22:54:15.602-04:00

With our glorification of bizarre behavior, Raina Kelley correctly makes the point that we dare the emotionally needy to shock and appall us; then we slam them. Kelley raises some solid issues in her recent essay in Newsweek.She labels it as beautiful and exasperating, that our democracy gives people the freedom to have as many children as they want. She describes money and how having lots of it

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-62381378354213974932009-04-29T10:00:00.004-04:002009-04-29T10:00:00.527-04:00

Can you imagine hiring a grandparent to be a paid nanny? Here is my monthly column that the Home News published on 4-27-09. Have you ever employed one of your parents at home or at your place of business? Did you set expectations clearly? If so, how?Kelly contacted me after reading my column on delayed child-bearing. When she told me that she and her husband, Dave, hired her mother as their nanny

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-75358464009485815522009-04-24T10:01:00.006-04:002009-04-26T23:53:55.301-04:00

He may not have cured all the ills of our economy as fast as we want (as if) but i don't ever recall this much positive buzz about a presidential marriage.A recent Newsweek article describes how the Obamas have the kind of marriage, equal and devoted, that millennials aspire to. "Veering from 50's era subservience (the Reagans) to boomer dysfunction (the Clintons)....now the Obamas are two

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-48617119307188630332009-04-14T18:46:00.006-04:002009-04-14T19:12:27.409-04:00

Fewer children are sharing rooms these days because of larger houses and smaller families.An article in the Miami Herald by Jodi Mailander-Farrell explained, "Sharing a room was once a childhood rite of passage, ranking right up there with waiting for the bathroom and fighting over the last piece of lasagna at dinner." But homes are 38% larger than 20 years ago and (as noted many times on

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-44217720066444655012009-04-07T21:45:00.007-04:002009-04-07T22:03:29.538-04:00

Sisters Breed Happiness While Brothers Breed Distress.In order to appear cultured, I pulled this from a BBC News release. This post is actually for my daughters (who read this Blog) to empower them to rib my son (who does not). Personally, I wouldn't know what this article is talking about since I'm one of three brothers and have no idea what having a sister is like. Professionally speaking: One

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-87395375313626554172009-04-02T20:30:00.013-04:002009-04-14T10:24:06.073-04:00

Eureka, my condition has been diagnosed! Consumer psychologists call it hyperopia, which is the medical term for farsightedness. The condition is the result of people looking too far ahead. In Oversaving, A Burden for Our Times, John Tierney explains, people are "so obsessed with preparing for the future that they can't enjoy the present, and they end up looking back sadly on all their lost

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-43354336423648615112009-03-31T15:37:00.016-04:002009-12-23T12:11:38.605-05:00

Aren't the residual effects of brotherly hatred sadly evident to this day in many regions of the world? My essay in the Home News Tribune (published on 3/26/09) discusses the Bible, an area in which I claim no expertise. But I always find the story of the brothers to be a compelling one and so I discussed it in my monthly column. I believe there is more to learn from the story than the

Dr. Alan M. Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00242709892550579433noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-88533580505940196102009-03-25T23:12:00.009-04:002009-04-05T10:06:50.732-04:00

Infertility doctors are getting better and better at delivering miracles. A recent piece in the Baltimore Sun titled, Limiting Reproduction asks some excellent questions:Is it responsible for a woman to bear children regardless of her age and number of babies involved?Is it ethical for fertility clinics to facilitate a paying customer's pregnancy simply because they know how?The article (

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-8613936509313860192009-03-18T22:20:00.004-04:002009-03-18T22:37:34.773-04:00

Fathers: Running the U.S. is like running a family.I like Lisa Belkin's essays. Her piece "Father in Chief" recently appeared in the NY Times. It's because our new President seems to be such a good father that the comparisons are numerous."Like governing", Belkin tells us, "parenting is messy". A good parent must tell the truth; shielding children from reality rarely works and leads to distrust.

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-12025375903861775472009-03-13T16:15:00.006-04:002009-03-13T16:26:27.027-04:00

Well isn't that headline good news?The nation's woes are inspiring people to make generous gestures to acquaintances, employees, and even strangers.Take 2 minutes to read a terrific piece by Judy Keen in USA Today. Yes, the times we are in are economically miserable, but there are some terrific people out there doing great stuff. Like Scott Haag in Milwaukee, who is offering his 75 workers $2000

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-85541930326194945012009-03-09T06:34:00.006-04:002009-03-09T06:53:29.390-04:00

"The key to happiness in life is low expectations" (author unknown).Research that shows Kids don't make you happy does not trouble me in the least. I am happy that my wife and I decided to have kids and we have 4 wonderful children, 2 of whom now have terrific spouses. Click here to listen to Robin Simon, Sociologist at FSU, discussing last summer's Newsweek article on this very topic. But, have

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-27888338209922533972009-03-04T22:45:00.013-05:002009-04-05T10:03:44.798-04:00

Overprotective parents and environmental hazards, how do we strike the proper balance?My friend since childhood Shiri, is fond of saying, "When you think about it, really everything is bad for you." It is true to a certain extent. How do parents make the best choices for their children without becoming overprotective helicopter parents?Peggy Orenstein wrote a great piece titled, The Toxic Paradox

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-91966982947308951422009-02-28T22:17:00.007-05:002009-02-28T22:54:09.813-05:00

When you can't sell your home and you have a good job offer elsewhere, what do you do? You and your spouse might consider splitting up for a bit. Welcome to the commuter marriage.This article on NPR covers some key issues. Census Bureau stats show that the number of people moving from one state to another has dropped 27% last year. As I said in an earlier post, there are certainly challenges in

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-2542699415761034122009-02-24T22:28:00.009-05:002009-04-05T10:07:36.249-04:00

This research is still as bogus as when I blogged about it last month, but since my son-in-law says that simply mentioning this topic will draw major attention to my website....well hey, I'm always up for a good experiment. Folks, correlation is not causation and please click here to read how I approched this topic previously.Can we please discuss some research that is more interesting?Like Liz

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-60045041998224278252009-02-19T23:20:00.011-05:002009-02-28T22:26:17.829-05:00

The First Couple is generating alot of buzz about happy marriages. Jocelyn Noveck's piece in the Washington Post is a delight to read. Their "21st Century White House Marriage" is setting high standards for our country. A number of important themes are touched on by Noveck including: date night for couples, balancing professional success with family stability, displaying affection, and spouses as

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-67471859256534522202009-02-17T22:41:00.005-05:002009-03-25T23:29:01.428-04:00

Kate Zernike does a masterful job of describing large families and barely mentions the world's newest octuplets (big plus). She describes 3 TV shows on TLC at the beginning of the article (click here to read it). Then she delves into some key elements of the discussion:*Smart women choose career; ambitionless women have children*Large families are presumed to be really rich having children as

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-26573357768516701532009-02-12T21:28:00.011-05:002009-05-05T23:14:15.313-04:00

Do you know how long I have been waiting to write my little meet-the-President story? Years. This column appeared in the February 11, 2009 Home News Tribune and was truly great fun to write.My brush with fame took place in the spring of 2006. I was waiting for an elevator in the U.S. Capitol building when U.S. Sen. Barack Obama appeared next to me. Here is our brief exchange:SINGER: "Senator

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-32472943116210321522009-02-10T22:17:00.008-05:002009-02-10T22:38:21.390-05:00

I never thought the day would come that I would completely agree with Stephanie Coontz. When I have read her books and essays, on average, I am about 30 - 40% in sync with her thinking. Her recent op-ed in the NY Times was tremendous. Titled "Till Children Do Us Part", the essay describes research of the Cowans which is fascinating. Marital satisfaction decreases with the arrival of each child;

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-41280593217590017352009-02-03T22:44:00.006-05:002009-02-03T22:59:15.100-05:00

As I boarded the plane for the flight back to New Jersey, I bought my last copy of the Jerusalem Post. In it, was a full page article by Judy Siegel, titled "Consultants in the Baby Business". It's a fascinating desrciption of the Puah Institute for Fertility According to Halacha (Jewish Law), which was established in 1990 and run in Jerusalem by R. Menachem Burstein (www.puahonline.org).Recap:

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19358812.post-50384779794510989732009-01-30T07:25:00.006-05:002009-01-30T13:38:55.685-05:00

Divorces have gone into the 5 digits for the first time in recorded Israeli history, with 10,225 Jewish couples divorcing in 2008 (Matthew Wagner, Jerusalem Post). What I find interesting is that the divorce statistics were not released from a demographic agency (in the U.S. it would be the Census Bureau) but rather from the Rabbinical Court Administration. Further, Wagner's article states, "The

Dr. Alan Singerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15349911328640999255noreply@blogger.com0